As well as it being Mother’s Day and my birthday, two years ago today I started my writing journey.
This photo below is a typewriter my friend Lynda gave me and is a lovely piece of inspiration in my room.
Without writing in my life I wouldn’t have met so many lovely people and had fab experiences. Thank you to my mum for all those years when I was naughty, instead of the naughty step I was placed at the table to write stories (a consequence I really enjoyed!)
Now on to the main reason I’m writing this:
A poem for mum and me:
My lovely mum and me
together for all eternity.
Are hearts entwined, they
beat as one. I don’t need
Or want another mother
You are my only one!
Thank you to all my family, friends and readers, I hope you enjoy my birthday in pictures! Thank you to everyone for their wishes, cards and to my grandparents for the money towards my uni fund.
They sent me to work sorting the valuables like gold teeth, jewellery and good quality clothes and other trinkets. It’s funny how they consider Jews to be ‘a sub human race’ but they have no qlaums about pilfering our precious possessions. I suppose with them it’s a matter of choosing when and what to believe.
I clutched my thin piece of prison garb: (stripped clothes, shaved heads and numbers etched on our broken skin, red and itchy with infection.) around my chest but that was like putting a plaster on a broken arm. My size too small clogs pinched my toes in a vice grip. Fostbite, the soles now let in the dank grey mud mixed with snow.
I followed the SS officer with his blood red arm band to the ‘treasure trove’. The wharehouse had a draft that rattled between my rib cage, goosebumps springing up in protest. I was surprised a part of me was still fighting.
What were other people’s belongings were piled four feet deep like a black unforgiving ocean, seeing these would usually be a person’s oasis but, it was tinged with sadness instead of salvation.
Shoved in my place I began to methodically sort, trying not to think of the memories attached to them and their owners. Spiky paced up and down a whip at his side eying us with disgust. Long ago, I decided to give names to all the guards because I believe that if you humanise fear it is not so fearful.
As I trudged back to my barracks I kept my head down to the wails from punishment, emancipated elderly and the bodies of infants piled high on carts, they should of smelled like vanilla but, they smelled of death. I tried to turn my mind away from the diseased barrack awaiting me, piled high to the rafters and then some.
Snow crunched beneath my every step, the flicker of the hope in my heart began to dim.
Tips are my own and may not work for everyone – consult your doctor before making any major changes to diet or medications.
Organise your medication for the week – I’m ashamed to say my mother does this for me. It’ll be easier especially during brain fog where you don’t have to think of what tablet to take.
Say there’s a TV show you want to watch at 9pm but it’s too late for you? Well take an hour and half nap in the early afternoon because you’ll be refreshed but by the time 9pm rolls around you’ll be tired enough to sleep through the night later on.
Don’t beat yourself up about flare days or having to cancel on friends – they should love you enough to understand, you already feel guilty and you don’t need added pressure on top.
Make the most of good days even if it’s just a walk outside
If you’re like me and whilst your body hurts but your mind is racing, let audiobooks/colouring become your best friend or treat yourself to s Netflix subscription.
Natural sunlight is the best medication – typically the more vitamin D I have the more improved my ME is.
Understand what’s a flare and what’s not – a diary is helpful thing to have especially when visiting the doctors.
Flick the bird when someone says ‘Your illness isn’t real.’ You live it, they don’t.
Regular toilet visits help especially with all the meds.
Anti depressants help – an invisible illness is hard to deal with
Don’t get your hopes up about trials and new research.
Connect with the chronic illness community on social media – you are not alone!