So I’m always anxious before changes since my A & E visit, especially it was the nurse who couldn’t get it out last time. I was meant to go to the doctor for my friend dizzy to calm me but I forgot.
Anyway she deflated the balloon and began to tug and the pain was horrific. I breathed through it but it was too much and not budging. The nurse knew she’d fucked up because she kept wittering on about her new puppy and then proceeded to tell me to go to A & E… sigh. I knew what awaited me. She was also saying ‘if you see a urologist…’ love we just see a nurse and then go home. She didn’t even bother to ring ahead.
So anyway, 15 minutes waiting I was called through to see a nurse and low and behold it was my lovely Andrew who changed it when it got stuck last time.
Obviously my heart rate was high due to anxiety and me and gas and air don’t have a good relationship as it induces a panick attack.
With me sweating buckets and gripping my mother’s hand, flinching at any slightest touch.
Two minutes later and what felt like hours to me (by the way, nobody tells you on G and A that you can hear but can’t respond.. scary) he got it out and inserted a fresh one. He was also disgusted to learn the attitude of the nurse and that they’ve arranged for it to be changed every eight weeks because it risks infection.
On his advice, we went to my GP for a referral back to urology because they said it shouldn’t be that agonising. The doctor suggested that my bladder tube had narrowed so it may require another operation but anything to get rid of the pain.
FACT: when you pee blood but don’t actually pee it out naturally you CAN feel it burning.
I couldn’t have got through Wednesday without my mum.
Whilst I was there I asked about any new ME trials as my flares are getting worse and their aren’t any. She also was appalled that I hadn’t heard anything from AMHS and I firmly believe speaking to a physiatrist will help me get past this point. (Also, if I don’t get an appointment from urology in the next eight weeks, she’ll prescribe me a dizzy for the next change.
Surprise surprise! No news on wheelchair..